Wednesday, August 22, 2007


When I first saw the abbreviation "STD" around wedding websites, I thought that people were a bit forward with their situation regarding HPV, herpes or syphilis.

Turns out a save-the-date (STD) in wedding world parlance is not about various diseases, but rather about a notice to send guests announcing your impending nuptials months before the wedding. In this day and age, it isn't enough to give people two months' notice of your event. No, you need to let them know four, six, eight, even twelve months in advance so they can "save the date."

The biggest secret about save the dates is that you don't actually need them. The thing is about them, if people don't already know when you are getting married six months out, how important is it for them to be there? And if they are good but forgetful friends, will a postcard in the mail do anything to help them remember?

And then it brings up the inevitable etiquette question- if you sent someone a save-the-date, can you not send them an invitation if you have some sort of falling out? The answer is, of course, no. You told them an invitation was coming, so you need to follow through with your word, and send the invite.

That said, I feel that there are circumstances where I could see that it might be beneficial to let people know ahead of time (i.e. more than two months out) about the details of your day. Getting married in NYC over New Year's? Or at a ski resort in Vermont over President's Day weekend? There are some times when technical details (read: booking flights/hotels) need to be taken care of more than two months in advance. But most save-the-dates that I have seen don't seem to include the necessary travel information.

I bring to you our solution: An email with a link to a wedding website containing all the necessary travel information. Sending email is free! And there are plenty of websites, such as ewedding, tgwedding and mywedding that offer free templates and hosting.

Now, I recognize that not everyone is technologically savvy in this day and age. So what if you need to send some information to Great Aunt Mildred so she can make sure not to schedule a deluxe motorcoach tour of the nation's capital during that point in time?

"Great Aunt Mildred, the senior tour can wait- I'm getting married!"

Seniortours offers tours for the nation's retirees.

You should either call her, or if you don't want to hear about her latest bout of rheumatism, you can send a save the date. Something along the lines of these:

French Vintage Save the Date from Wedding Paper Divas

1 comment:

mnc said...

that's hilarious! the senior coach!lol
I agree that if they don't already know at least the month you're getting marries, they likely need not be invited...
And web sites do make it all a lot easier.